Tag Archive: Happenings

What is wine?

Ironic, I think it is; my excuse for not updating my Journal was, at some point, that nothing and only nothing was happening in my life.  In one respect my excuse still is completely valid since nothing of major interest has indeed taken place; I now sit here though feeling as if so many things have happened that I’ll never be able to remember them all to share them.

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Viruses, tickets and Boost! Oh my!

[She] decided to tell me how she had felt about me when she was going through a rough time with [him].  Was it because she felt we were friends enough for her to share that with me, and it was just conveniently timed given the events that had taken place?  Or perhaps it was because she strongly felt that her relationship was over?

Since my last real post I’ve had quite some exciting things happening to me—perhaps I should post entries more often.

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Only 65.9 years to go!

My heart’s racing away at 1000mph, my brain pulses and aches, my stomach churns away and my neck burns.  I lie here nauseously, shivering violently in a cold sweat.

It’s five in the morning and I’ve been in bed for so long.  Work is now a mere matter of hours away and I will have had no sleep when I walk though those doors.  Why does this happen to me so often?  What am I freaking out about?  I’m not consciously thinking of anything at the moment.  I have no reason to feel like this!

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I feel…

I have considered myself to be a person without emotions and feelings for a little while now, but I sure do seem to write ‘I feel’ a lot for such a person.  So perhaps I have been quite wrong and I’m considering not seeing myself that way anymore.

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So how are we?

To receive the answer to this with as little confusion as possible, you’ll pretty much have to disregard my verbal responses.  I will come clean now and respond with great honesty: I don’t feel right.  I don’t feel okay.  I don’t feel happy and I have no idea why.

Or, rather, I lie again.  I have an idea why I don’t feel happy but I’m pretty damn sure (and I equally hope) that it’s not this that’s getting me down so badly because I’ve been trying so hard for this not to affect me.  There are indeed other things on my mind though, regardless of whether or not they should be.

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I didn't need that.

I’ve just woken from a dream that is going to mentally screw me over quite badly for the next couple days or more—which is something I really don’t need in my current state.  My head is heavy with the already prevalent tormenting thoughts and visions as it is.

This is something I’ve successfully avoided thinking about for almost a year now and I don’t know why I’ve gone into some sort of relapse.  Funnily enough though, it’s something I always saw and feared happening.

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Oh, it tinkles.

Here’s something for you all to remember: when you’re swinging a computer monitor around over your head, pay more attention to your light fittings or you’ll have a mass of electircal wiring hanging from your ceiling and shards of glass all over the place, including your desk, your bedside table, your floor, your chair and your bed. More »